Tuesday, July 10, 2012

The History of Man, SJ style

I have become convinced that my children, and all children in a way, are replaying the development of man. Or at least, what I've remembered from seventh grade history of it.

Firefly, prehistoric man: Writes on the walls. Forages for food, with mixed success. Rarely wears appropriate clothing. Grunts. Okay, we don't actually know whether cave people grunted, but in movies they do. Finds things and makes ineffective weapons out of them. Quarrelous and grumpy with other members of humanity.Very mixed success at keeping himself alive. Short. Likes dogs.

Genome, bronze age: Writing exists, but he doesn't know for what purpose. Counts things. Eats only substances designated as food. Finds things and makes much better weapons out of them. Willing to form strategic alliances with other members of humanity to suit his particular purpose. Somewhat better at keeping himself alive. Less short. Likes dogs.

Munchkin, early history: Groping towards literacy. Has numeracy and some geometry. Wries on paper. Eats selectively of substances designated as food. Specialises -- lets other people (Genome and Firefly) fight her battles with her. Part of a highly complicated society, all members of which are small girls who cry a lot. Reasonably good at keeping herself alive, although spotty on details of modern medicine and must be reminded to brush teeth. Still pretty short, but what are you going to do. Likes dogs.

1 comment:

  1. Ahaha, this is great. I especially like "Rarely wears appropriate clothing. Grunts."