Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Stealth Jew needs an imaginary friend

Recently a friend of mine has taken her child to the doctor. He appears to be suffering from hallucinations. This is obviously very serious and very sad, and I hope he can be helped. That said, the whole incident has concerned me somewhat, as I realised that if Munchkin hallucinated I would have absolutely no idea.

You see, Munchkin's barrier between fantasy and reality seems permeable at the best of times. When I was pregnant with Firefly, she was convinced for months that she, too, was pregnant. With a baby panda. A girl panda. She laid out an outfit for the girl panda, and I was starting to get concerned that when said panda failed to materialise, she would be worried or terribly disappointed. You see how the unreality of a four-year-old has a way of sucking me in.

Someone suggested that perhaps she is just creative. This is possible. But she has an imaginary friend named "Imaginary," which seems rather literal.

Yesterday Munchkin informed me that I was going to have a girl baby next (she tries to slip this in at various intervals, as she is a believer in the power of suggestion and positive thinking). I said something about being helpless against the force of her preference. She said, "yes, forest. The baby girl is in the forest."
"In the forest?"
"Yes, in the forest. Waiting for G-d to put her in your tummy. But she's not afraid."

All right then.

Little does Munchkin know that there's a whole world of imaginary friends out here on the internet. I could use one today, because Firefly has colic. Colic can bite me. In fact, Firefly can bite me, too, if only he'll stop crying while he does it.


  1. Just sounds like a kid with imagination to me, honestly, especially at her age. Kids say some very weird, objectively interesting but a bit worrisome nonetheless things when they're being imaginative.

  2. I have always loved the imagination of Munchkin. I think I have said it before....perhaps she isn't imagining but rather, she has an incredible gift.

  3. @ Katie - I suspect it's just that I'm such a literal-minded person, whereas Munchkin often sounds like a refugee from an E. Nesbit book. I appreciate the reassurance though.

    @ Haddassah - IYH she has a great future in children's books ahead of her!

  4. Yes! I always thought writers wrote children as so much weirder and more precocious than they are... until my friends and family started having children after I was an adult.

    I have heard a toddler explain with complete earnestness all about how she had to stomp on a specific crayon because it was the color of bad dogs. The crayon was purple.

  5. I love your blog. I can't wait to read your next post. Need an imaginary friend? Will a purple haired Catholic mom of 6 from Oklahoma work, or were you hoping for something weird?

  6. @ aka the Mom - I am always intrigued by mothers of many. It helps put my problems into perspective ;)

  7. My four-year old told us very seriously yesterday that she had received a phone call on her imaginary cell phone from Jetson Podley. He wanted to tell her that there was a fire, but that it was okay, because he's on another planet. He was getting close to the fire though, so he thought he should let her know.

    I looked at my husband and mouthed "Jetson Podley.." with a questioning expression. He said, "Of that entire statement, the fact that the imaginary alien has a name is what you have a problem with?"

    Kids are fanciful things!